5 Mistakes Every Play Therapist Makes (And How to Grow from Them)

We’ve all been there.

You walk out of a session thinking, “Did that even help? Am I doing this right? Should I refer this client to someone who knows what they’re doing?”

If those thoughts sound familiar, I want you to know—you’re not alone. Whether you're new to play therapy, a seasoned pro, or somewhere in between, we all face those moments of doubt. And more often than not, they come down to a handful of common challenges.

Today, I'm diving into five of the biggest mistakes play therapists make—and more importantly, how to move past them with confidence and clarity.

1. Over-Focusing on the “Right” Activity

We love our play therapy activities. Trust me, I have shelves packed with books from Lianna Lowenstein, Paris Goodyear-Brown, and more. Activities are fun, creative, and engaging. But when we hyper-focus on which activity to use, we lose sight of the bigger picture: our theoretical model.

Whether you’re child-centered, Adlerian, Gestalt, or integrative—your model is your map. It tells you what stage of therapy you’re in, what the child is working through, and how to guide them. The activity is just a tool to support that process.

The Fix: Before choosing an activity, ask:
What does my model say about where we are and what needs to happen next?

2. Waiting Too Long to Involve Parents

I get it—you don’t want to overwhelm parents. You know they’re already juggling a lot. But waiting too long to involve them (or not involving them at all) can stall progress and leave you feeling stuck.

Play therapy models like Adlerian and child-centered both emphasize parent involvement, even if that looks different from model to model. Regardless of your approach, parents need clarity around expectations and their role in the process.

The Fix: Establish your expectations from the first call. Communicate clearly with parents about how and when they’ll be involved, and what their role looks like in supporting their child’s growth.

3. Skipping Case Conceptualization

When we jump straight into sessions without a solid understanding of the client’s background, patterns, and environment, we set ourselves up to feel lost.

Gathering psychosocial information, symptom history, family dynamics, developmental milestones—it all feeds into a strong case conceptualization that guides your decisions every step of the way.

The Fix: Don’t skip the intake. Use it to build your working hypothesis. Then, let that guide your assessment, your model application, and your ongoing interventions.

4. Neglecting Your Own Nervous System

This is one that gets even the most seasoned of us. Play therapy is intense, relational, and emotional work. If you’re not checking in with yourself between sessions, that wear and tear will catch up with you fast.

I used to reset by cleaning up my office between sessions—deep breaths, a mental reset, letting go of the previous session so I could be fully present for the next one. Even now, I rely on nature, quiet time, family connection, and spiritual practice to refill my cup.

The Fix: Build a rhythm that works for you. Check in between sessions. Breathe. Reflect. Tend to your nervous system so you can show up grounded and ready.

5. Trying to Be the Perfect Play Therapist

This one’s tough. Because we care. We want to do right by our clients. We feel responsible for their outcomes. But here’s the truth: you don’t have to be perfect. You can’t be.

Sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is be present. Fully present. When you make mistakes (because you will), the repair work can be just as healing—especially for kids who’ve never experienced safe, attuned repair.

The Fix: Let go of perfection. Embrace congruence. Lead with unconditional positive regard. And when something’s off, name it, repair it, and keep going.

Recap: You’ve Got This

These five mistakes are so common, but the good news is—they’re also fixable:

Reconnect with your theoretical model before picking an activity.
Don’t delay parent involvement—start early and clearly.
Build a solid case conceptualization from the start.
Take care of your own nervous system.
Let go of perfection and lead with authenticity.

And remember, you’re not in this alone.

In Play Therapy Academy, we walk through these challenges together. We consult, we support, we grow. If you’re ready to stop second-guessing and start stepping into your confidence as a play therapist, I’d love to chat with you.

Let’s take your skills—and your clients—to the next level.

💬 Want to learn more about Play Therapy Academy?
Visit rhplaytherapytraining.com and schedule a free 30-minute video call to see if it’s the right fit for you.

Categories: : Burnout, Congruence, Play Therapy, Play Therapy Academy, Play Therapy Elevation Circle, Play Therapy Model, Podcast, Self care, Therapeutic Rapport